My day isn't over, although technically it's the eve of the next day-July 21st, but I'm still in yesterday. Sunday/ these good wills will come. I'm trying to make a rock out of this day yet. On the walk home I felt the humid air and the thick drops of the first monsoon rain beginning on my face. The lightning desert sky lit up in parallel strikes. The streets were empty, I didn't know what time it was. The roads were wet and they always seem more intruiging like that. I thought about the last time I walked home from the bowling alley, and how much walking I do when I'm not in my hometown. I enjoy walking because it's so constant. My feet never get tired, and when I'm surrounded by pleasant atmosphere I'll walk like I'm getting paid to do it. Which actually leads me to a rather interesting hypothisis to my on-going restless nights. I'm always tossing and turning and my legs are never comfortable in any position. This causes me to wake up all the time, and some nights I realize I'm lying in bed feeling bored, like a waiting room. It seems maybe that my body, or my lower-body is always in that "go" mode and doesn't equate-in sleep. It's obvious also that constant travel for months on end doesn't help any. Hard or soft beds won't make a difference, just like futons, couches, blow-up beds, carpet or wood floors, hammicks, beaches, tables, RV dashboards, bathtubs, vans, or sleeping-sitting up. Last week I started taking pills. It helps at times, but I'm afraid of a habit forming, and then lazy zombie-like state sets in during daylight, drooling, heightened insanity, death. I want to figure this out purely, for the most part. At any rate, the truely wonderful thing about today is that it finally rained! Thank God for that. Our prayers were answered! The crops are drinking, the air is clensing, let it pour for days to come! Tomorrow the income needs to be coming, from somewhere. I will seek sources! I will seek a schedule and plan. I will seek coffee, nurishment, vitamins. I will seek renewal, and hope, and in these trialing times, I will seek strength, and The will shall be more solid. Solomn day goodnight, this is the end of our time together tonight. I love you. thank you. in honor and unworthyness.